Some people love the holidays, but for many people, the holidays bring with them things such as financial worries, weight gain, family dynamics that bring out the worst in some of us and relationship stress. Personally, I love the spirit of the holidays, but have an extremely hard time with them. I write tips not from a place of all-knowing, but from a place of “I get this.”
I will even admit that I have been known just to skip a holiday here and there because I wasn’t in the mood for it. When I moved to Texas and my grown son, Jordan, was still in Wisconsin I stayed home in my pajamas on Christmas because I was depressed that I wasn’t able to see my kid. Of course, I could have gone to see family in Dallas or gone to see my friends that were in the area for “post-family” cocktails, but for me that year, I felt so drained and sad because all I could think about was how much I missed my son and how alone I felt. I know I would have been better off to stay active, to get around people and to have fun in whatever capacity it was available to me.
When Jordan was growing up, I was a single mom and we didn’t have a lot of money and so Christmas sometimes was tough because I couldn’t afford a lot of frivolous stuff. Luckily, I had a child that never really wanted much. He’s always been pretty down-to-earth and enjoyed having “old-school” Nintendo games even when his friends all had the latest and greatest technology. Later, when I was able to afford more and bought expensive gifts for extended family, it never felt right, or appreciated. I prefer to do things for people when I can, not because it is Christmas, but because I want to or am able to. I finally stopped buying gifts for most people and began donating money each year to a worthy cause because it felt like the right thing to do and was needed more than some of the gifts that I had given in the past. I still buy small gifts for some people and this year we are going in January to visit family. I don’t get to see my son this holiday, so I’m having a tough time with that, but I have new family members now and hope that with the changes in my life, also may bring a change of heart about the holidays.
The best advice I can give to anyone who may be struggling is to keep focused on the positive, albeit hard to do sometimes. Find things to keep you busy, like networking events and parties, without over-burdening yourself and becoming harried. Don’t over spend. Nobody needs a WII or and IPhone more than you need to pay your bills. Stay healthy. The holidays are not a good time to make major transformations, but a time to try to maintain health and fitness. Keep going to the gym, eat clean. Make “better” bad choices when you go to parties. If there is something that you are struggling with, please feel free to email me at: [email protected] and I’m happy to help and offer suggestions.
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Liz Jones is the Wellness Coordinator for the City of Mesquite a wellness professional in Rockwall, Mesquite, Wylie and surrounding areas. She is a writer, certified yoga instructor, personal trainer and wellness coach. She holds a Master’s Degree in Organizational Leadership and Strategic Management, with a graduate certificate in Ethics and Leadership. Her undergraduate studies included communication, business, writing, art, fitness, and dance. Liz Jones can be reached at: [email protected].